Hip and Thigh: Smiting Theological Philistines with a Great Slaughter. Judges 15:8

Friday, September 15, 2006

Ah, the sound of hippy protester heads smacking the pavement

After a rather emotional first part of the week, I thought I would return to the more mundane issue of life...

I am a law enforcement kind of guy. Even when I have a run-in on rare (I mean really rare) occasions with a cop.

The first time I was ever pulled over by a trooper was my first year in college. I was meeting some friends to do an over the weekend camping trip. We met at the parking lot of the Tasty Freeze in this small town, and I was to follow them out to another friend's rural farm where we were going to camp. My grandma's old 69' Plymouth Valiant with the slant 6 engine couldn't keep up with the lead vehicle, so I missed the turn off and became lost real quick. When I realized I had gone too far, I turned around in disgust and was going to return home when all of the sudden I see these blue lights flashing in my rear view mirror. I thought the guy wanted by, so I pulled over to let him pass, and to my dismay, he pulled in behind me.

The typical conversation took place, "Where you going?" "Whose car is this?" "Can I search your car?" To which my eyes became big and I whimpered, "sure." I believe he thought he was going to catch a pothead with a load of stash in the trunk, but it was my camping gear and some old electronic gadgets my dad had left in the car. He was so disappointed he wasn't going to run-in some punk. But I received my first ticket of my life because my plate tags had expired the week before.

Another time during the late evening, some friends and I were passing through this small town called Newport on our way to Batesville where we lived and we get pulled over by a cop (I wasn't driving) who asked us where we were all from and where we are going. We responded, "Batesville," to which he said, "Well, I don't know what you all do in Batesville, but here in Newport, we drive with our lights on when it starts getting dark." Thank you, sir.

Now, I wouldn't necessarily want to do the job of a policeman, or the military for that matter, and in spite of the fact that every once in a great while a cop may give me some smart aleck remark about something I am allegedly doing he doesn't like, I appreciate and respect the job he does. I respond politely with "yes sir-no sir," and I would never, ever thinking of fleeing the police, because as officer Pecadillo pointed out in a recent post, if you run from the cops, you may receive a severe spanking.

One of the areas I really feel for our law enforcement agents is with the reigning in of anti-war, anarchist protesters. A gigantic mob of mentally unstable individuals could be daunting, and law enforcement has always been hard pressed to enforce the law, keep the protesting activities from destroying property and hurting themselves if they were to get out of hand. For years, I would occasionally come across a program on the Discovery Channel telling about all these great, futuristic, non-lethal weapons, but they were only on the drawing boards and no where close to being inventoried for mob control use. The program would showcase weapons that would temporarily blind or mentally impair the mob. Another one was said to produce sound waves at the right frequency that causes the urge to go to the bath room to become overwhelming.

Welp, these futuristic weapons are now on the verge of being used. The Air Force is recommending that these new, non-lethal weapons, designed for use on the battlefield, should be used on testy mobs first. I find that a bit of delightful news, because if there was ever a recurrence of what happened in Seattle a few years ago when chaos ruled the downtown streets by a group of wacko anarchist, before innocent by-standers got injured and property gets destroyed, these weapons would stop them in their tracks. Yes, I realize the potential for a class action lawsuit is ripe for the picking, but for just a moment, it would be a glorious site to see a mass of blacked hooded lawbreaking hippies lying on the ground incapacitated.



Blogger Highland Host said...

Yes, it does have some appeal. Having seen such people (and met them), I have a great deal of sympathy with you.

2:36 PM, September 16, 2006  

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